The clock is tick-tick-ticking off its judgments. Tick – stupid. Tick – Hey, stupid. It’s new. I bought it for six bucks at the local five-and-dime. La Virgen de Guadalupe smiles serenely from its face, held aloft by angels.

Black Swan, White Swan... Let's Call the Whole Thing Off

Formal logic might be the blackest of magics (and it makes for the most excruciating of reads). Just try figuring out the Black Swan Problem. Read a ton of obnoxious articles by formal logicians – who I imagine wear capes and brood in towers while they go about their dark art of turning language into math – without pushing your thumbs into your eyeballs until they pop.

Donald Duck: High Priest of the Illuminati

Conspiracy theorists are dreadfully thorough, but I guess most of them missed this one: Donald in Mathmagic Land, the 1959 Disney featurette starring Donald Duck which teaches us about the Pythagorean cult, the pentagram, the Fibonacci Sequence, and the Golden Ratio.

Jack Kirby And Comic Book Mysticism

You may not recognize the name Jack Kirby, but if you’ve ever argued with your friends over who gets to be Cyclops when you were playing X-Men in your backyard, then you’ve been touched by his creations.

Eye of the Skeptic

Those “I’m always right” types absolutely need faith, or else those vicious doubts start creeping in. Not only will you find faith in the religious mind, calling God a fact, you’ll also find it lurking in the atheist, saying He isn’t. Come to think of it, anyone who uses the word “fact” so easily must be pretty faithful, at least when it comes to their own nonsense.

Monday, August 26, 2013

Lord Steven Christ: Heaven is Only a Tattoo Away -Disinformation

Originally Published August 26, 2013 via disinfo.com

There’s nothing novel about someone claiming to be the returned Messiah.  In fact, with the dissemination of information being what it is these days, it’s hard to throw a palm branch without hitting one.  But few of them have been arrested for threatening to assassinate the President like Steven Joseph Christopher (aka Lord Steven Christ).
Steven’s arrest came in January 2009 after the following post was made on the alien-earth.org forum on January 11:
ok we have 6 days until my Presidential Assasination.
Yes, I have decided I will assasinate Barack Obama. It’s really nothing personal about the man. He speaks well, has a loving although controlling wife and two cute daughters. But I know it’s for the country’s own good that I do this. And I’m not racist either, my family is a little, but isn’t all Italian and European families? I mean how many times have you heard the word (racial slur) in the comforts of your home? I have a lot, and it really bothered me and I would confront them about it. No, it’s not because I’m racist that I will kill Barack, it’s because I can no longer allow the Jewish parasites to bully their way into making the American people submit to their evil ways. How many of you Obama supporters are now disappointed after some of his arm-twisted Jewish appointee decisions??? Make’s you think he’s not really in charge(which he isn’t). No it’s the same old, same old filthy (expletive) (racial slur) who are poisoning America, who have murdered thousands of innocent lives on 9-11-01, and are thinking that they are going to get away with it again.”
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Friday, August 23, 2013

Ouija Boards, Zozo, and an Interview With a Demon -Sitting Now

Originally published August 23, 2013 via sittingnow.co.uk

I grew up in the throes of the Satanic Panic of the 80s with a baptist preacher for a father, meaning no He-Man, no Dungeons & Dragons, and definitely no Ouija boards.  To be honest, the only real loss I felt was over the He-Man and D&D ban.  In my mind, Ouija was always aligned with seances, superstition, and big-haired mediums from Long Island.

But then I found some hoaxy YouTube videos and internet yarns describing a demon named Zozo that haunted unwary Ouija dabblers, negatively influencing their lives and even possessing them.

I’ve never been able to make myself believe in ghosts.  The idea of dead spinsters sticking around their old houses with unfinished business just seems boring to me.  Demon possession, on the other hand, is something I can totally dig.  It’s sexy, exciting, and it spooks people in a way that ghosts never could.  I decided to finally try out the Ouija, if only to get back at my folks for not letting me watch Masters of the Universe.  But before I did, I wanted to find out what this mysterious board was all about.

The Ouija board was first made available commercially by Elijah Bond and Charles Kennard in July of 1890, but was by no means the first of its kind.  The Spiritualism movement in the United States had been in full swing since the 1850s, and tools facilitating communication with the dead were in high demand.

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Monday, August 19, 2013

Frater Isla's Head Inflates After Reading Wikipedia Entry

I may have arrived, folks.  While following a link to the Wikipedia entry for the Initiative Collective, a non-profit organization that I wrote a Disinfo article about, I noticed a certain someone in the references section.

God bless it.  I'm a reference.  Eat your heart out, Webster's.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Haunted Curiosities' Guide to Duping Goth Kids and Twilight Fans -Disinformation

Originally published Aug 15, 2013 via disinfo.com

There was a kid in my high school named Chris or John, but we all called him “Dick.”  He wore a trench coat and combat boots, and he started telling people he was an honest-to-goodness vampire.  He would cower in the shadows and play out an uninspired pantomime of retreating from the sun in pain.  I remember him telling us that he had woken up on the ceiling above his bed one morning.  He was clearly a resident of the highest social tier.

I haven’t thought about Dick in years, but last night I came across a grown-up version of him on YouTube, “Anthony, the living vampire,” being interviewed by a woman named DeeDee, who runs the Haunted Curiosities and Haunted Collector websites.

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Friday, August 9, 2013

Donald Duck: High Priest of the Illuminati -Disinformation

Originally Published August 9, 2013 via disinfo.com

“You do find mathematics in the darndest places.”
-Donald Duck

Conspiracy theorists are dreadfully thorough, but I guess most of them missed this one: Donald in Mathmagic Land, the 1959 Disney featurette starring Donald Duck which teaches us about the Pythagorean cult, the pentagram, the Fibonacci Sequence, and the Golden Ratio.

As is the case with most men of influence, Walt Disney has been identified as a member of the Illuminati (or at least a pawn) by more than one conspiracy buff.  Accusations have included pedophilia, child sexual programming, occult slavery, Freemasonry ties, blah blah blah.  Pretty much, the usual.  An interesting list of some of the weirder points appears in an earlier Disinfo article by 5by5.

One recurring accusation is that the Disney films and cartoons are riddled with subliminal messages of a sexual nature. Most likely, you’ve heard of them before. A dust cloud in The Lion King spells out the word, “sex.”  A phallus shows up on the cover of The Little Mermaid.  Aladdin says, “Teenagers take off your clothes.”  The list goes on a bit.

Other than the sexual subliminals, there are also numerous “Illuminati symbols” supposedly hidden throughout the cartoons and the Disney theme parks, as well.  Most notably, the symbolism surrounding the infamous Club 33 at Disneyland (a members only club inside the park), and the cartoon, Gravity Falls.

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Thursday, August 1, 2013

Back Alley Jinn Exorcism in the UK -Disinformation

Originally published August 1, 2013 via disinfo.com

Last year, the BBC reported on a case where four family members were found guilty of murder.  The victim, Naila Mumtaz, an expectant mother, was found smothered in the home she shared with her husband, Mohammed, in Birmingham, England.  Mohammed and his parents, Zia Ul-Haq and Salma Aslan, along with his brother-in-law, Hammad Hassan, denied the allegations and defended themselves by claiming that Naila’s injuries were self-inflicted, and that she was possessed by a jinn (djinn), an Islamic evil spirit, similar to the Christian concept of a demon.

Although it received some media attention, this was not an isolated case.  Catrin Nye (BBC) reported a rise of criminal abuse in the UK related to the exorcism of jinn (a practice called “Ruqyah”) in recent years.  Some of these cases have resulted in the victims’ death, with the so-called “healer” (“raaqi”) often escaping punishment, being hidden by members of their communities.  Even in the majority of cases, where death does not occur, we find victims of schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and other mental health issues being denied the proper medical treatment in favor of exorcism.

The jinn are described in the Qur’an (55:15) as a race of creatures with free will, created from a “smokeless flame” by Allah.  They are physical in nature, but are invisible to humans.  The fact that the jinn have free will means that they can be good, evil, or neutral.  However, Islam’s Satan, known as Iblis or Shaytan, was the only jinn to be considered equal in standing to the angels.  The Qur’an tells the story of the creation of Adam, where Allah commands the angels to prostrate before the freshly minted human.  Only Iblis refuses (7:11-12). This story may be the reason behind the general view of the jinn as essentially malevolent.

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